Hobson's Choice: When Homosexuality is the Only Option

     There is a percentage of gay men that I feel are conveniently gay or gay by circumstance.  As superficial as the gay community can be, it is also very accepting of people that are...differentNow, don't throw tomatoes at me just yet, let me explain myself!  When I say different, I am not just targeting the physically awkward or the socially impaired, but also those with very unconventional mind frames.  I have been noticing that some people have no other choice but to be either gay or lonely.
     Believe it or not, there are some men that are naturally effeminate; they speak with a lisp because of a speech impediment and frail bodies run in their family.  I have seen this for myself.  In spite of being heterosexual, women assume that these guys are gay.  No amount of persuading could convince a woman, especially when you're saying, "People always take me for a homothexual, but I'm not."  Furthermore, women normally prefer men that provides a certain feeling of security; it's needless to say that these guys do not qualify.  To make matters worse, its even more difficult to convince the men knocking down their door.

At what point do you throw up the white flag and accept love, regardless of where it's coming from?

     Some men suffer from social anxieties, they have a very hard time approaching anyone, let alone someone of the opposite sex.  Due to their crippling shyness, they require someone dominant to engage them into a relationship.  When there aren't enough overbearing women available, they fall into the grasp of alpha males or power bottoms.  Homosexual by circumstance, this kind of man would've been with whomever snatched him up first.  In my book, he's a pushover, not gay.
     I have come across some men and women that were too eccentric to be in a heterosexual relationship.  These people have such an abstract view on sex and relationships, that they fall into homosexual lifestyle almost by accident.  What other community receives polyamory, kinky sex and other wild preferences so freely?  These guys are attracted to acceptance more than the same-sex.
     This also applies to lesbians as well; I have many stud friends that are actually bisexual but very few men are attracted to masculine women.  So, they get in where the fit in.  However, if presented with a heterosexual fling where acceptance was evident, they would definitely give it a try. 
Where am I going with this?

     I think homosexuality is learned for some people, or better, homosexuality is chosen as the best option in an otherwise bad hand.  In spite of internal feelings and desires, 'you can't choose family' sometimes. 

Okay, I'm ready for the tomatoes! 


ToddyEnglish said...

::Toddy picks up a big rotten Tomato:: hahahaha...lol. Naw, no Tomatoes...::Toddy throws blueberries at Forbidden light instead:: keekeekee...

Uhm, hmmmmm...

1.)There is no reason to have a lisp nowadays. When I was a little kid I had a HELLACIOUS lisp...y'hear me? HELLISH (LOL). I would say, "The Thold Thethells by the theathore..." That was until two years in speech therapy with Mrs. Stolzberg and Ms. Wylie. By the time I got to HS I was ennunctiating PERFECTLY...lol.

2.) I think individuals, as you've described, do exist; however, they are probably so few and far between as to be rendered null. Granted, I think Prison inmates can definitely "go gay for the stay." However, I find it highly unlikely that a truly heterosexual male or female wouldn't become a monk or a nun before lying down with someone of the same sex.

Speaking for myself the mere thought of having sex with a woman makes me want to go celibate...No offense to the ladies (ya'll are beautiful)but...no. So if someone highly fem and straight were to go with a dude I would strike it up to either being Bicurious or latently bisexual.

Because, whether we think so or not, there are people of the opposite sex who find more gender ambiguous opposite sex makes appealing. Look at Prince. He is a flaming queen except for the fact that he doesn't bed down with guys (atleast not anymore...alas I digress).

Once again a very interesting post Mr. Light! lol


no tomatoes here either, but i can't see real homosexuality as a choice. a jail sentence can have its effect, but aren't there conjugal visits? i've known some fems, but not that personally to venture such a question... could the reasoning be right? i dunno!! but it's interesting nonetheless to think of those that stand on the fringe of marginality itself.

Forbidden Light said...

I'm so glad to have you back, Mr. Bear! I missed you!

After reading this article to myself, I think the underline sentiment with this article was that same-sex relationships could potentially be secondary in our motives behind joining this community. Acceptance being first.

Not to discount those who just naturally love cock! LOL


me love those indeed, from as far as i can remember.
mister bear wasn't far, just busy with various matters. i may be a single guy, but i do have a father to take care of, friends to visit, a job to do, tend to my own blogs, & perhaps, find a few minutes just for myself...that's when my cat, the only pussy in my life, lets me have those few minutes!!!

acceptance is key to human nature as we usually tend to be gregarious, but acceptance is not necessarily available within the community. we ask for acceptance from mainstream society, when we often deny it to some of our own. a sad affair as it is often a cruel world for some, and i'm not convinced the community brings that much comfort to those who barely fit in the stereotypes we still impose upon ourselves. i usually tend to be accepting of others, as long as they are respectful of themselves and others. i can't say the favor was always returned... but i remain true to myself, refusing to compromise on my person as some people tried to make me do when i was younger, trying to erase me to turn me into something i'm not. they've come & gone, and i'm still here, standing. the main source of acceptance is from yourself. i've learned that, the hard way...



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